Tuesday, June 28, 2016

Positive Support

My observation prompted Mom to write:

"You are right.  She accepts the brain is changing and her aceptance is a gift.  She has a positive attitude about it.  Part of that attitude is because she truly doesn't understand the scope of the changes, the ultimate end of the disease.  However, part of her positive attitude is because of the way she's treated.  When she's frustrated, you & I both remind her that we all are frustrated some of the time.  Every day when she forgets what she is saying or what she was going to do I tell her it's ok.  I turn it to how often I do the same thing.  When she spends hours sorting her beads by color then asks if it's ok if she uses them, I want to scream.  I take a deep breath and tell her that it's ok to use them.  When she's asked me the same question 5 times in one hour I calmly answer her 5 times in that long hour.  When she tells me over and over about construction someplace, I thank her for telling me since I didn't know about it.  She reminds me she can't decide what she wants for dinner and I remind her, as well, that I don't know either.  (I simply am tired of having to decide.)

As long as I can remain positive for her, toward her, then I believe she will continue to have a positive outlook.  But over the past 46 yrs I have tried to make each of you feel good about yourselves.  I tried to instill confidence in you and your abilities.  I tried not to dwell on any shortcomings because I didn't want you to grow up thinking you weren't quite good enough.  I didn't want any of you to get to age 50 and THEN realize that you are a good person.  I can't help but believe that I did succeed."


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