Monday, June 16, 2014

Changing Contexts

Yesterday was Father's Day here in the US.  Yesterday was also our regularly scheduled Skype conversation.  Lyn was quick to follow Mom's lead in wishing my husband a Happy Father's Day.  Lyn was all smiles as she called out "Happy Father's Day" to him.  She was happy to see him on screen and delighted when he graciously thanked her for thinking of him.

For me, the day was one to be ignored as much as possible while we were growing up.  Our father's choice to be absent from our lives made the whole concept painful to me.  Lyn seemed to live in the moment and never seemed to carry that burden with her.  While she could be upset by someone mentioning our father, she didn't seem to dwell on him or his absence.  She didn't seem to miss him.  I missed him terribly and it tormented me for a very long time.  I envied her ability to set it aside.

My husband is a wonderful man who has changed the context of Father's Day for me.  Now, when Lyn calls out a cheery salutation for the day, I don't wince inside.  She's happy to wish someone well and he's happy to accept.

Living in the moment has its advantages.

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