Manipulation Tactics
Yesterday at day hab, the staff practiced with Lyn getting on and off the van. Mom had sent along a small, light color rug to serve as a visual taget as Lyn stepped down from the van. Lyn told the staff she could not see it. She claimed to see only black.
When Mom got Lyn home, she took a second small rug and held it up, asking Lyn what she saw. Lyn very clearly saw and desccribed the rug. Over the course of the evening, Lyn indicated that she had seen the rug at day hab. She pretended to not see it because she likes when the staff helps her.
She is manipulative. She always has been.
She is having panic attacks and she is genuinely frightened. However, in a situation she perceives as controlled and safe, she wll work to have the attention on her. It is a form of feeling valued and connected. It allows her to feel a sense of control overserself and her environment.
It is also incredibly maddening. It is hard fo the rest of us who do not live in her reality to have patience with behavior like this. Grandma was the same way. She could charm one moment and then spin on a dime to be ugly or vindictive. Lyn did exactly that when I was on the phone checking on them. She was calm until Mom turned the channel on the television at which point Lyn got ugly. If Lyn follows Grandma's pat of deterioration, she will continue to try to manipulate when she can.
Lyn is taking a rug again tomorrow and they will practice again. Given today's outbursts, I suspect she will see the run just fine.
When Mom got Lyn home, she took a second small rug and held it up, asking Lyn what she saw. Lyn very clearly saw and desccribed the rug. Over the course of the evening, Lyn indicated that she had seen the rug at day hab. She pretended to not see it because she likes when the staff helps her.
She is manipulative. She always has been.
She is having panic attacks and she is genuinely frightened. However, in a situation she perceives as controlled and safe, she wll work to have the attention on her. It is a form of feeling valued and connected. It allows her to feel a sense of control overserself and her environment.
It is also incredibly maddening. It is hard fo the rest of us who do not live in her reality to have patience with behavior like this. Grandma was the same way. She could charm one moment and then spin on a dime to be ugly or vindictive. Lyn did exactly that when I was on the phone checking on them. She was calm until Mom turned the channel on the television at which point Lyn got ugly. If Lyn follows Grandma's pat of deterioration, she will continue to try to manipulate when she can.
Lyn is taking a rug again tomorrow and they will practice again. Given today's outbursts, I suspect she will see the run just fine.
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