Mom's Angry


  • Blood test has revealed a minor hypoactive thyroid.  Thyroid hormone replacement therapy has begun.
  • Urinalysis has come back normal.
  • MRI result is "normal."
  • EEG has been done.  Results have not been shared with Mom yet.
  • Appointment with the neurologist has not yet been scheduled. 

Mom writes:
Another frustrating evening.  It’s only 11:30pm, I am tired but unable to sleep.  When Lyn went to take her bath tonight she seemed a bit irritated.  Don't know why.  When she came back in the living room she said, "I was thinking of something and now I can't.  I wanted to say something and I can't.  I wanted to do something and I can't."  She was mad and I wanted to cry.  I told her that some days are going to be like this and I did't want her to get mad about it but just try to think of something else or come tell me & I'll try to help.  I said this is why we'll see the dr to try to figure it out.  She just looked disgusted and went to her room.

On Friday I got the report regarding the MRI.  It was a pre-printed form and at the bottom was written “MRI-normal” and nothing more.  It’s been some time since I was instantly angry then glad then angry again.

Her brain isn’t normal!  Otherwise she wouldn’t be like she is.  What about all the white areas around both spheres?  I was glad there were no tumors etc.  I know I must wait for EEG results which I believe will tell more.

I remember about 25 yrs ago when she had an MRI.  I was told that the frontal lobe showed damage and that’s why her speech was so delayed, accounts for some of the retardation.  No way to find those records.

Over the weekend and today I reached out to 2 people whom I respect and trust very much.  I have questions and felt either would help guide me.  Of course, I should have known better.  One never returned my call & the other said “I keep you in my prayers.”  It reminds me of the 10 yrs I cared for mother.

When I began caring for Mom everyone said, “This will be very difficult on you.  I’m here for you, for moral support.  If you just need to talk I’m here for you.”  Well, didn’t matter if it was one of her sisters, sister-in-law, her cousin, one of my brothers or a sister-in-law when I reached out I was rebuffed.  “Sorry, I can’t talk now,"  "I don’t want to discuss it" or "It is your problem.”   However, these were the very ones to criticize me quickly.

This will be the same thing.  I will just have to remember NOT to reach out to anyone but my other daughter.  Poor dear, she’s so far away and has her own family I hate to burden her, although she will disagree with me on this one.

(And I do.)


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